Humpty Dumpty

i've been making a lot of lists lately - to do lists, to buy lists, for me, for my family, for my co-workers, for my friends. i have lost half the lists and yet i continue to list. why? well, because it turns out that my slow summer wasn't just due to the super-humid stagnant days and the general madness of society. apparently the powers that be decided to try to destroy my god complex and cure me of my world leader tendencies. apparently i am not infallible, like the pope. i can get a little under the weather. but to the powers, i stick out my tongue because i can get fixed and that is what i am about to do. so on wednesday i go into hospital to have my tummy cut open and the defective bits taken out. WOO HOO!!! i'm about to be fixed. and for this i have a list of all the great things about this:

1. six weeks off work!
2. i have been told that, despite not having done a crunch in ages, i still have abs, that might hurt a little in the near future.
3. i shall conquer the alien invasion of my body.
4. i get to be spoiled by my mother. i wonder if i could convince her to make carrot soup. i wonder if i still like carrot soup.
5. did i mention the six weeks off work? the thought apparently still boggles the brain.
6. if i ever get arrested i'll have a scar to prove my street cred. not everyone is intimidated by my vampire bite marks.
7. no more meds and that means, hopefully, no frightful mood swings and general madness. of course that means i'll have less defence should i commit a "crime of passion". darn.
8. i get to test the effective range of my cordless keyboard and mouse. oh and the effective range of my eyesight... now i wonder why i got a desktop.
9. i get to sleep all i want for a little bit. and my mother may even encourage me to sleep. that i would pay to see.
10. i may even be perky this winter to make up for the sluggish summer.

the sad bit is that i will be unable to blog for a little bit. not until i can sneak past my mom. and that woman sees everything. it is an uncanny gift. my undercover buddy tu...07 suggested i recruit guest bloggers to wax lyrical about me in my absence. i'm thinking i'll make a list.