Veni, Vidi.... Ahem...

so about two months ago i was training for the miami marathon - the first step in my mission to run new york. i was doing a "tempo" run on a treadmill - because i watch law & order and will not run in the park after dark, i don't care what anyone says. so, at about mile 4, i pound down with my left leg and an incredible pain shoots through the bone on the left side of my knee (do i even have a bone there?) i grab the side bars and lift myself up for a bit, roll back the speed and kinda limp to the end of the run.

the weekend comes around and i head out for my twelve mile run and at mile seven, the pain is back. i try, i try but i can't do it and limp home (lord, what a long walk!) and pull myself up to my fourth floor walk-up (where is a strapping young lad to hoist you up when you need one). i think to myself, i must be a little tired. i spend the day on my couch and head out the next day to buy flat shoes so i can rest the knees a bit. i end up with three pairs of low heels (they were cute and, i mean, the heels are really low) and don't run for the week.

the next weekend i get to mile 3 before i conk out. i think - well i didn't really rest and there was the heels thing. so i go out and buy a real pair of flat boots and really don't run for a week. next weekend - i barely made it to mile one before the pain kicked in. i slowed, from a trot to a jog, and fought back the urge to burst into tears. yes, i had been training (on and off) for about 7 months. yes, i had actually topped ten miles. and, yes, i had already booked my flight, hotel and invited friends to miami. so there really was no way i was not running this marathon. no reason to cry. just call the doctor and maybe she will give me painkillers and recommend a knee brace. i'll be good.

next thing i know i am seeing an orthopaedic specialist and he is talking about it-bands and torn cartilage. then i am sent to physiotherapy and getting an mri. then the physiotherapist is saying something about not being allowed in the gym for a while and absolutely no running for three weeks. but my marathon is in 3 weeks i want to tell them but i don't really want to hear what they have to say. instead i say it to my roommate who tells me that i need to give up on the marathon gig - apparently it's not the only marathon in the world and there will be others. but i have been training for so long, i have to run it. then she says something about denial not just being a river in egypt but my geography stinks so i am not sure if it is also a mountain in afghanistan or a valley in brazil. my friend suggests i take many pictures of myself right now so that i will be able to remember a time when i could walk.

then, after some really excruciating "massages" i lie back and wait for the aleve to kick in (it doesn't; my leg still hurts) and i start to think about life beyond next week. everyone is telling me that sitting out of the marathon will do me good in the long term. others are threatening to make anonymous calls to my therapist and out me. and i have not run in almost a month - there is NO WAY i could marathon it now. i conceded defeat. i am now going to walk the half-marathon (yes, that is defeat, eks!). my friend is buying a leash to make sure i do not break into a run, no matter how tempted i am. i am not going to let this get me down - my friends will just have to drown my sorrows in many vodka drinks.

i am waving the white flag